It's a rebuilding year

I'm back. It's been awhile, but I'm back. Maybe short-term, maybe long-term, maybe somewhere in between. Only time will tell.

It's been almost three months since my dear husband of almost 8 1/2 years e-mailed me from across the state to inform me he was no longer interested in being married and was seeking divorce. I'm not going to lie, it rocked my world, threw me into upheaval, left me homeless and feeling a little worthless and unloved.

Have no fear, my friends, that didn't last very long. As it turns out, I have done a so much for myself over the last few years and all of these things have truly helped me discover and solidify who I am as a human. I have too much going for me to wallow in self-pity.

And so with this revelation, I have dubbed 2018 as a rebuilding year. It will be year of rebuilding my identity and what it means to be a newly single woman with ambitions and confidence, of rebuilding a home, of building on old and new relationships with friends.

All of that said, it's Valentine's Day. I've never been one to celebrate the day but maybe I'll start because it's a good time to remember to love myself, love others and do what I love.

I ran 2 miles today...

...and it's been awhile since I've run, so I feel pretty good about that.  Granted, I've been riding my bike to work and back a few days a week (6.3 miles each way) when the weather is nice, so I was hoping that exercise meant I'd be able to jog for awhile.  There was actually a 5k race this morning that I could have done for free (someone else dropped out), but Josh is gone this weekend so it's just Brooke and me, and I couldn't make it work.  Anyway, instead of going out for a long ride, I decided to take a run. 

I realize I haven't written anything for awhile, but there's really nothing exciting going on, and now that it's private, I have no idea if anyone is reading.  Hello?  Are you out there?  BTW, I can add you to an e-mail list that lets you know if I actually do write anything...uhh...that is....if you're out there. 


Anyway, my mom, dad, sister and her boyfriend and maybe said boyfriend's mom are coming to brunch tomorrow at our house, so I spent all night cleaning some stuff up.  I have no idea how our house gets so damn dirty!  It's pretty stupid, to tell the truth, but it also makes me appreciate how much work my mom put into housekeeping when we were growing up.  Then again, she didn't work until we were nearly out of high school, so maybe it was easier?  That's what I keep telling myself anyway. 

Oh, on Friday night Brooke and I went to sushi and a couple sat down next to use with a baby and the baby's nae was Ace.  I thought that was the BEST name EVER and I think that if any of my friends or family have a baby boy they should name him Ace.  I can't name a baby said name because I have no intention of having babies, so there.

How's this for the most boring post ever?  ...

MM

1st attempt at baby leggings

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Lent

Did I mention that Josh and I started a little weight loss competition right after the new year?  Yeah, started on 1/2/10 and goes until 4/1/10.  I was certain that he was going to win because I really only wanted to lose the 20 pounds I had gained after I lost 50 and Josh has a history of being able to drop 25 pounds in a month.  Anyway, I don't really know what the winner actually wins, but now I'm starting to think I'm actually capable.  I've been diligent about tracking my points (I've been on and off Weight Watchers for the past 2.5 years) and have dropped about 10 pounds in 6 weeks, and that includes the tiem I spent laying on the couch after surgery.  I still can't really exercise the way I want to, but have done pilates at home a few times.  I originally told him that if I win I want to be able to go see Alison in Mpls (hi, Alison!) but I don't know if we'll even be able to afford that, so we'll see. 

So this whole thing leads into Lent.  I couldn't figure out what I wanted to give up and thought long and hard about stuff until last night...when really I should have decided by Tuesday night.  Oh well.  I figured it out right before I went to bed.  I'm not going to eat or drink anything after 8pm Sunday through Thursday.  I know this sounds ridiculous because really, who limits their Lenten journey to 5 nights a week?  I do.  And I like to think I have good reason for this....that being the fact that our weekends are so unpredictable.  We are always so busy on the weekends and sometimes don't end up at home until 7 or 8pm and then I have to figure out what to do for dinner.  Plus, it's bound to work wonders for my weight loss if I limit my beverages at night to before 8pm...most of the time I don't drink anything until 7pm anyway.  Does that sound lame?  I've also become really bad about brushing my teeth at night and flossing everyday, so I added that into my Lenten journey as well.  Super lame.  Makes me sound like I'm either a dentist or 80 years old...or both.  Oh well!  Overall, I suppose my promise to myself is to try to take care of myself a little more...wish me luck :)

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In case you haven't heard...

...our wedding was featured on offbeatbride.com today!

http://offbeatbride.com/2009/11/idaho-river-wedding

I was pretty obsessed with OBB when we were planning the wedding and reception and submitted our profile just as soon as I had pictures in my hands. It took a few months, but here we are!

This was sitting next to my new sewing machine

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