Thursday, June 28, 2007
Ouch
I almost killed my boyfriend with Icy Hot on Tuesday night. It was truly a sight to be seen--I've never seen someone scramble so quickly to take clothes off (to shower) and put clothes on (to keep from being cold) within a three minute period of time. I've also never typed as quickly as I did when I attempted to google how to take the burn out of Icy Hot....there really is no cure, by the way.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
Keeping God in America
Dear God,
When we were driving back to Boise from a fabulous weekend on the Lochsa River (thanks for making that, by the way--it is amazing!), we drove through Cascade, Idaho. It seems as though some people think that we need to "Keep God in America." They said it right on the marquee! I got to thinking about it and have decided that they are right. I am now going to make it my own personal mission to keep you here (and only here) in this powerful country.
For starters, I will begin by putting up large fences around the United States. I am stating this country, as opposed to all of the Americas, because the people who put up the marquee also had a million and a half American flags on their property and one can only assume that they mean that we should keep you in the United States, not all of the Americas. With my new barrier, you will no longer be able to pass through customs with the ease of which you formerly had. No day trips to Canada for weed (ok, lunch) and no weekend jaunts to Mexico for tiny trinkets, got it? I don't care how good the tacos are in Tijuana, we need you here at all times and it is very important that you stick to this.
Along these same lines, it will now be very, very important for you to increase your surveillance and protection over the U.S. and it's true citizens. Now that we have claimed you as ours and only ours, there will be no aide to other countries. This includes the illegal immigrants (and even some of the legal ones--we just can't be too sure). There are starving babies right here in the U.S. that need your help and those African babies dying of AIDS and hunger will just have to stick it out. Also, it is very, very important that you keep our troops safe and only allow us to hurt and kill the bad guys, got it? The Muslims, Jews, Shiites, and other religious fools can pray to their own gods for help and protection. We cannot share you any longer. Christians in the U.S. have complete priority over all of your actions and you will no longer have jurisdiction over other countries. Unfortunately, you will have no say in this matter.
God, we need you here, big time. We know that you are an all-powerful, amazing, loving, God and we are God-fearing people (what does that mean, anyway?) We love America it is important that we keep God in America!
When we were driving back to Boise from a fabulous weekend on the Lochsa River (thanks for making that, by the way--it is amazing!), we drove through Cascade, Idaho. It seems as though some people think that we need to "Keep God in America." They said it right on the marquee! I got to thinking about it and have decided that they are right. I am now going to make it my own personal mission to keep you here (and only here) in this powerful country.
For starters, I will begin by putting up large fences around the United States. I am stating this country, as opposed to all of the Americas, because the people who put up the marquee also had a million and a half American flags on their property and one can only assume that they mean that we should keep you in the United States, not all of the Americas. With my new barrier, you will no longer be able to pass through customs with the ease of which you formerly had. No day trips to Canada for weed (ok, lunch) and no weekend jaunts to Mexico for tiny trinkets, got it? I don't care how good the tacos are in Tijuana, we need you here at all times and it is very important that you stick to this.
Along these same lines, it will now be very, very important for you to increase your surveillance and protection over the U.S. and it's true citizens. Now that we have claimed you as ours and only ours, there will be no aide to other countries. This includes the illegal immigrants (and even some of the legal ones--we just can't be too sure). There are starving babies right here in the U.S. that need your help and those African babies dying of AIDS and hunger will just have to stick it out. Also, it is very, very important that you keep our troops safe and only allow us to hurt and kill the bad guys, got it? The Muslims, Jews, Shiites, and other religious fools can pray to their own gods for help and protection. We cannot share you any longer. Christians in the U.S. have complete priority over all of your actions and you will no longer have jurisdiction over other countries. Unfortunately, you will have no say in this matter.
God, we need you here, big time. We know that you are an all-powerful, amazing, loving, God and we are God-fearing people (what does that mean, anyway?) We love America it is important that we keep God in America!
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Principals
When I was in high school, a family friend of mine convinced me to take voice lessons. I'm not sure what purpose those lessons were supposed to serve, but I did it. Every week I would head to this old lady's house and sing songs from the 40s and 50s and learned about proper posture and breathing. Every week, without fail, she would ask me to talk to Ted Totorica at Borah (my high school) about joining choir. After several weeks, I got up the nerve to ask him if I could join the "zero hour" choir, which meant that I was giving up an extra hour of sleep to go sing at 7am every morning. I was a bit nervous when I went to talk to him, but I finally did it.
And he said no.
I was denied. Without any hesitation (and without even listening to me sing), he told me that there were too many people in "that choir" and that even though I was taking private voice lessons, I could not be in it.
From that moment on, I made it a point to be available for any function possible at Borah. I played guitar and sang to raise money for United Way and I played for a dedication for a trophy case (what? who does that?!). I earned extra points for my American Government class for playing protest songs during our studies about the Vietnam War. The list continues on. I made it a point to make sure that Ted Totorica knew that I could actually sing and that he made a mistake by not letting me join choir.
During the last week of work, I found out that Mr. Ted Totorica would be joining the elementary school staff as the Assistant Principal.
And he said no.
I was denied. Without any hesitation (and without even listening to me sing), he told me that there were too many people in "that choir" and that even though I was taking private voice lessons, I could not be in it.
From that moment on, I made it a point to be available for any function possible at Borah. I played guitar and sang to raise money for United Way and I played for a dedication for a trophy case (what? who does that?!). I earned extra points for my American Government class for playing protest songs during our studies about the Vietnam War. The list continues on. I made it a point to make sure that Ted Totorica knew that I could actually sing and that he made a mistake by not letting me join choir.
During the last week of work, I found out that Mr. Ted Totorica would be joining the elementary school staff as the Assistant Principal.
Monday, June 18, 2007
Middle Fork Trip
My feet have a brownish tint on the soles of them and my body still wreaks of odor that has not washed off after the first few showers. The tops of my feet have acquired a more distinct "river print" from wearing my Tevas on the river for nearly an entire week and I have found sand in nearly every place possible. My contacts were glued to my eyes until Saturday night at 11:45, when I finally took them out to sleep. I still cannot bring myself to putting them back in yet. Bruises will continue to appear for another day or so and I will continue to have no idea which fall or slide caused it to appear.
Everyday last week, I woke up to an amazing mountainous view outside our tent. After marveling at the view for at least 10 minutes before climbing out of my sleeping back, I would stumble to the common area of the campground and drink coffee from the same stainless steel coffee mug that held my wine the night before...sometimes with Bailey's and sometimes without. The daily routine didn't vary much: get up, eat breakfast, break down the tent, pack up, load the boats, get on the river, drink some beer, stop for lunch, drink more beer, back on the river, get to the campsite, drink more beer, unload, set up the tent, drink some wine, eat dinner, sit around, drink more wine, and sleep.
More specific daily activities were varied. We stopped at a few hot springs along the river one day, then hiked up to Veil Falls and Parrot's Grotto another day. We drank tequila straight out of the bottle prior to having moose steaks for dinner one night and later, in the night sky, Josh and I ran off (rather intoxicated) to sit in the hot springs at our campsite. (Tequila can make people do crazy things). The next night, I drank wine and read a book alone in the tent to recuperate from being around 11 other people for so long. With so much hiking up and down trails and maneuvering around rocks to see the waterfalls, squatting became difficult later in the week and would probably still be a problem for me, if I didn't have the convenience of a flushing toilet in my apartment right now.
It poured down rain the first night of our trip and I wondered what the hell I had gotten myself into, especially after my sunglasses broke before we even hit the water and my chair broke on the second night, but when the sun shone bright and warm the next day (our first day on the river) and we saw three bears on the side of the mountain our first day, I was convinced this would be a fabulous trip. And that it was. We didn't flip the boat or fall out (though we did get stuck on a rock when I was rowing one day) and a bucket as a toilet isn't as bad as it sounds when you've got the Frank Church Wilderness in full view.
You really can't beat a trip like this, especially when the company keeps you laughing at every bend in the river. There are MANY stories to be told and one blog can't hold them all--it would take me hours to write and more time than you have to read them in one sitting. So for now, enjoy the photos!
Everyday last week, I woke up to an amazing mountainous view outside our tent. After marveling at the view for at least 10 minutes before climbing out of my sleeping back, I would stumble to the common area of the campground and drink coffee from the same stainless steel coffee mug that held my wine the night before...sometimes with Bailey's and sometimes without. The daily routine didn't vary much: get up, eat breakfast, break down the tent, pack up, load the boats, get on the river, drink some beer, stop for lunch, drink more beer, back on the river, get to the campsite, drink more beer, unload, set up the tent, drink some wine, eat dinner, sit around, drink more wine, and sleep.
More specific daily activities were varied. We stopped at a few hot springs along the river one day, then hiked up to Veil Falls and Parrot's Grotto another day. We drank tequila straight out of the bottle prior to having moose steaks for dinner one night and later, in the night sky, Josh and I ran off (rather intoxicated) to sit in the hot springs at our campsite. (Tequila can make people do crazy things). The next night, I drank wine and read a book alone in the tent to recuperate from being around 11 other people for so long. With so much hiking up and down trails and maneuvering around rocks to see the waterfalls, squatting became difficult later in the week and would probably still be a problem for me, if I didn't have the convenience of a flushing toilet in my apartment right now.
It poured down rain the first night of our trip and I wondered what the hell I had gotten myself into, especially after my sunglasses broke before we even hit the water and my chair broke on the second night, but when the sun shone bright and warm the next day (our first day on the river) and we saw three bears on the side of the mountain our first day, I was convinced this would be a fabulous trip. And that it was. We didn't flip the boat or fall out (though we did get stuck on a rock when I was rowing one day) and a bucket as a toilet isn't as bad as it sounds when you've got the Frank Church Wilderness in full view.
You really can't beat a trip like this, especially when the company keeps you laughing at every bend in the river. There are MANY stories to be told and one blog can't hold them all--it would take me hours to write and more time than you have to read them in one sitting. So for now, enjoy the photos!
Friday, June 08, 2007
summer
Some things you should know:
1. My 3 week Grantsmanship course has ended and I am the proud recipient of an A for the course.
2. School ended yesterday and I am happy to report that I am officially free of work responsibilities (unless I choose otherwise throughout the summer) until August 24, 2007.
3. I am currently a baking fool. So far today, I've made 2 loaves of banana bread, one pan of corn bread, and one of two batches of chocolate chip cookies for the MiddleFork trip. Whew!
1. My 3 week Grantsmanship course has ended and I am the proud recipient of an A for the course.
2. School ended yesterday and I am happy to report that I am officially free of work responsibilities (unless I choose otherwise throughout the summer) until August 24, 2007.
3. I am currently a baking fool. So far today, I've made 2 loaves of banana bread, one pan of corn bread, and one of two batches of chocolate chip cookies for the MiddleFork trip. Whew!
last weekend
Things I learned in Crouch, Idaho last weekend:
1. Driving 30 mph uphill isn't so bad. The Jeep doesn't have a whole lot of power going uphill when it has the trailer with camping gear, rafting gear, and a shit-ton of beer in it. We weren't all that surprised when car after car passed us, but we got quite the thrill when the yellow Corvette was pulled over by a cop when we finally made it to the top!
2. $13 BBQ is totally worth it.
We had to wait for what seemed like an eternity to get our food at the BBQ after our day of rafting, but when we saw the amazing pile of food on our plates, we decided that things would be juuuuuuust fine. My favorite part of standing in the BBQ line was watching the guy dunk my biscuit in a vat of melted butter...mmmm. I wish I had a picture for you.
3. How to steal a keg from the Longhorn Bar. It's true, we saw 2 guys walk into the cooler, pick up a keg, and walk out the door with it. The bartender said, "Hey, get out of my cooler!" when she saw them go into it, then promptly turned around and mixed drinks for the thirsty rafters as the guys stole the keg.
4. Josh is one lucky bastard. he bought $10 of raffle tickets and won 5 prizes! WTF?! I got my share of it though--the whistle is now attached to my life preserver.
5. The Dirty Shame is the place to party. We started the night at the Longhorn with all of the other rafters and decided to head back to our campsite fairly early...after all, we still had 2 cases of beer and 7&7s to drink. On our walk back down the highway, we stopped in at The Dirty Shame, which was really just that. I don't even think I have anything entertaining to report about that, other than the fact that I ran into someone from high school over there. We just liked the name of the bar.
6. How to tell a spinning star from a shooting star. Tradition in Josh's family is to spot 3 satellites or 1 shooting star before being allowed to hit the hay. If you see a spinning star, it just means that you are really, really messed up.
7. Water bottles can serve several purposes. When we got back to our campsite, I decided that I wanted a 7&7 so I got out my Seagrams and lemon-lime soda only to find that I had nothing to drink it out of. So I pulled out the water bottle that Josh won in the raffle and made myself a cocktail. In the morning, we dug through the camping supplies only to realize that there were not coffee mugs or cups. Oops. I rinsed out my cocktail bottle and poured the coffee in there. Nothin' like drinking coffee that actually takes like liquor at 8am.
8. This whole camping/rafting thing is right up my alley. I've always liked camping, so I didn't have to "learn" that, but every time we go rafting, I feel like I'm going to puke from nervousness, then pee my pants from excitement...or is it all of the beer we drink...hmm. Either way, I'm getting more and more excited for this Middlefork trip. We leave Sunday...woo hoo!
Anything I left out boys?
1. Driving 30 mph uphill isn't so bad. The Jeep doesn't have a whole lot of power going uphill when it has the trailer with camping gear, rafting gear, and a shit-ton of beer in it. We weren't all that surprised when car after car passed us, but we got quite the thrill when the yellow Corvette was pulled over by a cop when we finally made it to the top!
2. $13 BBQ is totally worth it.
We had to wait for what seemed like an eternity to get our food at the BBQ after our day of rafting, but when we saw the amazing pile of food on our plates, we decided that things would be juuuuuuust fine. My favorite part of standing in the BBQ line was watching the guy dunk my biscuit in a vat of melted butter...mmmm. I wish I had a picture for you.
3. How to steal a keg from the Longhorn Bar. It's true, we saw 2 guys walk into the cooler, pick up a keg, and walk out the door with it. The bartender said, "Hey, get out of my cooler!" when she saw them go into it, then promptly turned around and mixed drinks for the thirsty rafters as the guys stole the keg.
4. Josh is one lucky bastard. he bought $10 of raffle tickets and won 5 prizes! WTF?! I got my share of it though--the whistle is now attached to my life preserver.
5. The Dirty Shame is the place to party. We started the night at the Longhorn with all of the other rafters and decided to head back to our campsite fairly early...after all, we still had 2 cases of beer and 7&7s to drink. On our walk back down the highway, we stopped in at The Dirty Shame, which was really just that. I don't even think I have anything entertaining to report about that, other than the fact that I ran into someone from high school over there. We just liked the name of the bar.
6. How to tell a spinning star from a shooting star. Tradition in Josh's family is to spot 3 satellites or 1 shooting star before being allowed to hit the hay. If you see a spinning star, it just means that you are really, really messed up.
7. Water bottles can serve several purposes. When we got back to our campsite, I decided that I wanted a 7&7 so I got out my Seagrams and lemon-lime soda only to find that I had nothing to drink it out of. So I pulled out the water bottle that Josh won in the raffle and made myself a cocktail. In the morning, we dug through the camping supplies only to realize that there were not coffee mugs or cups. Oops. I rinsed out my cocktail bottle and poured the coffee in there. Nothin' like drinking coffee that actually takes like liquor at 8am.
8. This whole camping/rafting thing is right up my alley. I've always liked camping, so I didn't have to "learn" that, but every time we go rafting, I feel like I'm going to puke from nervousness, then pee my pants from excitement...or is it all of the beer we drink...hmm. Either way, I'm getting more and more excited for this Middlefork trip. We leave Sunday...woo hoo!
Anything I left out boys?
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